I still remember learning who Gia Carides was and finding out – with so much pleasure! – that she was married to Anthony LaPaglia. They were married for 17 years and they have one daughter who is 12 years old. Gia was Anthony’s second wife and they were close in age – he is 56 years old and Gia is 51. Well, Anthony left Gia in April. And he stepped out with his new girlfriend in May. The Daily Mail has just gotten around to identifying his new girlfriend… she’s a 26-year-old named Alexandra Henkel.
What is it with this 50-something dudes and their super-young girlfriends? How much of a cliché do these guys need to be? Granted, a 30 year age difference between a 56-year-old and a 26-year-old is not as bad as Steven Bauer (57) and his relationship with an 18 year old. It’s comparable to Anthony Kiedis (52) and his 21-year-old girlfriend though. THIRTY YEAR AGE DIFFERENCE. And for what? Just so you can live the dream as a 50-something dude and have a girlfriend born in 1989?
Here’s a photo of Gia Carides and Anthony LaPaglia from 2014. Ugh, I can’t believe he left her.
Anthony with Alexandra last month:
Photos courtesy of WENN.
He is even dying his hair. And beard. I’ll just leave it at that and go find myself a 20 something boytoy.
First thing I noticed, I’m guessing the new girlfriend doesn’t like seeing his gray hair. Probably reminds her of her grandpa.
I was just about to ask: I wonder if he knows how much older she already makes him look?
Oh, wait…you mean that’s not his 12 y.o. daughter?
Yep and he’ll be pushing a baby carriage and whiffing dirty diapers when he’s 60. Have fun with that.
No fool like an old fool.
STOP you guys – it’s love! Love of geezers!!! Not money and opportunity …
I wonder if he is dying his pubic hair too to remain consistent?
It’s likely he’s shaving downstairs. You know, cuz cutting the grass makes the trunks look bigger…
I used to really like him. He and Gia were very popular here, before they decamped to the U.S. My daughter has met them a few things, as she manages two of their properties here in Sydney. She always said they’re a lovely couple….wait until I tell her this! Now….nah, I’ve gone right off him.
Eww. Thanks for the visual. 😜
I know… YUCK.
I told my daughter about this. Her response: “What? Really? REALLY? Poor Gia. Pfft. Old man gets his jollies with gold digger. Yeah, she’s going to stick around to look after him when he’s 85… I. D. I. O. T. “
Guys who get women so much younger than themselves never seem to realize how old it makes them look. It’s only when Amal is standing next to Clooney that he starts looking older and kinda frail. Same with Depp and Heard.
And the tabloids have been all up in JEN/BEN.. not to mention the other celebs they focus on yearly.. but here is a celebrity that is never on a gossip site or tabloid and look at the drama.
His wife is very pretty. I googled her name to see who she was. This is what I say all the time. When men want to leave they leave..they don’t care about kids or what the public is going to say; they leave.
The new one has some similar facial features as the wife (I saw pics of her as a blond and they do looks a bit similar)
Maybe SHE left him because he is a cheater ? Why does it have to be the women who is weak and left alone ? We don’t know anything ! I hope she kicked him out and she’s enjoying her life d-bag free !
This was actually my first thought. It’s possible she found out he was cheating and kicked him curbside. Instead of being alone, he shacked up with Cabbage Patch Kid.
Maybe she did leave him or kick him out but that doesn’t make him any less foolish hooking up with a woman 30 years younger. It has nothing to do with his wife/ex being weak and everything thing to do with him being a idiot regardless of who initiated the split. I hope his exwife did kick him out. He’s still a dumbass in my book.
I’ve known women who have been the same way.
3 words: mid life crisis. That mixed with fame/gold digger is a recipe for disaster. Lets be honest no 20 something hooks up with a much older man unless he has lots of money and/or fame or she has serious daddy issues. Sad but i had a friend who was like that – she only went out with men old enough to be her father because they used to buy her things and treat her like she was a child.
I always say, “…. And if he was working at Walmart she would love him just as much, right?”
Repulsive
Exactly.
I am respectfully borrowing this from you.
Oh, Celebitchy posters, once again you make my day!
56 is past midlife.
Meanie.
Good point and other posters have mentioned this further down, but then…what is the term for this situation? It’s equally desperate.
Not if you live to 112!
I am 58, and I still refer to myself as middle-aged. I’m certainly not going to call myself elderly. Because I’m not, y’all. I mean it! Back off! Stop doing math! It comes to no good! Lol
Don’t feel bad GoodNames! I am only sightly older than you and I barley even feel middle aged. 🙂
Mid life doesn’t refer to the exact age you are in between your birth and your death. It is the period of time between your 40’s and your early to mid 60’s. He is definitely considered middle-aged.
I definitely think 60 is the end of middle age. At that age people look at you as a grandparent (even if you’re not).
Sorry, ladies. It happens to all of us, eh?
@Celebwatch – I don’t know if the grandparent argument holds water because during my grandparents’ generation, people were already grandparents by their late 30’s and early 40’s. Nowadays, late 30’s is near the end of young adulthood, while early 40’s is only the beginning of middle age. With people living longer, I can see how the concept of middle age is now going well into our 60’s in the modern era.
You’re so cynical and JEALOUS! What about LOVE though??? LOVE! It knows no age!
oh come on, the daddy issue or only for money thing is patronising and sexist. everyone’s free to like whoever they like, and if for a younger woman it’s older men that’s her choice and should be respected. there’s nothing wrong with it.
i feel for his wife, i mean, no one wants to be dumped for someone else. however, that doesn’t mean we need to be spiteful towards younger women in general.
It’s hard to get what a 20 something year old would see in a married mid-50s something year old who doesn’t look like Keanu Reeves though.
Every rule has its exeptions, but we can’t pretend there’s no “young gold digger+old resourseful partner” tendency.
If Rita Wilson dumped Tom Hanks and took up with a 20 something guy we’d assume he was with her just for the money too.
My spite is directed toward home wreckers.
Mid-life crisis? More like OAP crisis.
It’s rough when i realized at the ripe age of 32 I’m too old to be Hollywood arm candy now. All of my dreams down the tubes!
Nonsense! You are the perfect age to be arm candy for a man 60+. Look at Richard Gere and his new 32-year-old girlfriend, or Jeff Goldblum and his 31-year-old wife, or Billy Joel and his 33-year-old fiancee. It is all relative to his age. 😉
I thought she was Lohan for a sec. Thank goodness she isn’t. Sad that another apparent midlife crisis rears it’s ugly head.
Midlife? How many 112 year olds do you know?
Meanie.
There’s a strong possibility persons born 1980 and later will live well into their 100s barring accidents. So, don’t discount mid-fifties as midlife quite yet 😉
Midlife is the period of time in between your 40’s and early to mid 60’s. Sure, he is closer to death than his DOB, but he is definitely in his midlife.
@Ripley
Not with the obesity rates they have in the US.
I get what is it with these 50-something dudes and their super-young girlfriends – mid-life crisis is a powerful thing, but what I don’t get is what is it with these super young girlfriends with these 50-something dudes? I’m 26 and I admit to being attracted to some older guys, but being attracted to and wanting to date a guy with so much baggage and help him homewreck his long marriage are two different things. It doesn’t even seem like a cozy, mutually beneficial parasitic golddigger-multi-millionaire relationship either. If I were a gold-digger I wouldn’t choose him, that’s for sure. Anthony LaPaglia is neither irresistibly good looking, nor unbelievably rich and careless/stupid/old enough to not propose a pre-nup. What is wrong with you, woman?
Rich enough for her apparently.
He had a steady job on a popular show for 7 years or something like that. Maybe not rich for Hollywood but compared to a regular person I’m sure he’s loaded if he invested properly
He may not be rich but he’s famous and can open doors in the industry. Am sure it will come out at some point that she’s an aspiring actress – i will bet money on it.
I think it’s the allure of Hollywood and celebritydom, even from the vantage point of the C-list (or wherever he is in the pecking order), plain and simple.
I don’t get it either, even if he can open doors for her in Hollywood. Go date someone from an ABC Family show instead.
I didn’t get it either when Poppy Montgomery’s character on Without a Tracer preferred his character over the one played by Eric Close. In real life she’s probably only 13 years younger than LaPaglia as opposed to 30, and I was still baffled.
Ugh that was so stupid, thanks for reminding me. Of course she did fit the description of being someone with Daddy issues.
When my dad was 44, he left my mom for a 24 year old. I was 13 and I can say with all sincerity that I was more mature than she was. She was young and silly, but worse, she had a terrible relationship with her parents, and clearly thought my dad was going to fill some void. Plus my dad exaggerated his financial situation, and showered her with gifts at the beginning of their relationship, so she thought she’d scored a sugar daddy. She was too naive to realize that once things settled down, he would have an ex-wife and two children to support, leaving very little room for the extravagant lifestyle she was expecting.
Not all young women who hook up with much older men are as naive or have broken family bonds, but I think it’s more common than not.
How long did that relationship last, Granger?
Longer than anyone thought it would, BGE! About 13 years. But it was a very rocky relationship and my dad has since told me that he regretted leaving my mom. Which is probably the saddest part of all. Fortunately my mom moved on…
Do these men not realize everyone looks at them and thinks “pathetic?” Or do they just not care?
I ask the same question and my husband explained that a man doesn’t care as long as he’s getting himself a new piece! Since men primarily think with their private parts I guess they really don’t care what people think!
I think, at least deep down inside, most men envy guys like this. It’s the women who throw all the shade on it (duh!). And most men don’t care what women think, unless they are sleeping with them.
^^^^This, Boston Green Eyes!!
This. It’s women who are raised to care about what people think (please, I’m saying in general, not every woman, every man).
Would men still envy him when she dumps him when she’s 30 and moves on to someone her own age? Or would they secretly laugh at him?
Yep.
Crazy. I could never envy someone whose (albeit young and hot) partner is clearly just with them for money/fame. That would make me feel unwanted and terrible. Men and women are quite different I guess.
He doesn’t care that he looks like an idiot. He scored a 26 year old at the old age of 56. I think he can’t handle the fact that he is getting old. His ego must be huge.
I was never a big fan of this guy, and I never paid much attention to his private life. On a positive note, I will say that I’m glad he was too busy with other stuff, which paved the way for Gandolfini’s brilliance as Tony Soprano. Something I did not know until just now.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anthony_LaPaglia
I just watched a documentary on Showrunners and he had a brief interview in it. He came off like a huge douche – very angry and entitled.
Oooh! What a catch!
Phew! Thank you, David Chase, for that.
He met her when she was 25, because she posts stuff on Facebook I read on the DailyMail. For her 26th birthday recently it said she posted a photo of a brand new Mercedes with a bow around it he gave her for her birthday.
In February, he was photographed out at some establishment with the girl at a wrap party of a movie openingly holding hands, so it seems like the split happened earlier than is being reported.
A Mercedes? But she’s not a gold digger…
But she ain’t messin’ with no broke n*ggas
Ah gold digger. What a fool. I don’t see her appeal other than her age. His wife is gorgeous.
The mercedes bit is gross IMO. Maybe if they’d been together a few years, but after a few months? Ugh, I wouldn’t want a friend like her or him. It screams materialistic.
The wife is probably happy to be rid of his pathetic a$$. I would be. I just hope her lawyers are locking down his assets before he blows them on his doxie.
He was shooting a movie at my sister’s workplace recently and everyone was talking about how he left his wife for a side piece.
Yay, finally I have some gossip to contribute!
Saw pics of him on another website, and he has gone to h##l in a hand basket. Dying hair can only take you so far. It’s a real pity that this is how he chooses to handle aging. Great example for your 12 year old daughter.
He did a guest stint on “Frasier” in 2000 as Daphne’s annoying brother and he looked bad even then and he was only 40! I thought his acting on it was showboating and over the top so now I have another thing for which to dislike him
His wife was in Strictly Ballroom? Dude get it together! You were married to Liz Holt, what is wrong with him?
THANK YOU! The best character from the best movie…
Maybe if he was married to Tina Sparkle he wouldn’t have strayed?
In case you don’t know, Sonia Kruger, who played Tina Sparkle, is now a morning TV show presenter. She recently had her first child, an adorable girl named Maggie. She is 49.
Love love love Strictly Ballroom! I was trying to figure out where I knew the wife and now I remember! Thanks for the note!
Not only that, he was married to Robin Swallows (Austin Powers)!
#ImagineHimOnTopOfYou #totallygross
Hahahaha oh god no!!!
#idon’tknowificanforgiveloudnoises
#brainbleachplease
😉
AHHHHH!!!! NOOOO!!!!!!
I remember an episode of without a trace where he removed his shirt (I think it was a hostage situation or something). I was thoroughly disappointed. And you have me reliving that disappointment. Thanks (no thanks).
On the other hand, his brother Jonathan (the DA in Cold Case)……..
i googled jonathan lapag…. omg so much better of the two!! and with some facial hair… rrrrwwwarrrrr
Imagine kissing him and getting an allergic reaction from having the chemicals from that “Just For Men” beard rubbing in your bare skin.
ROFL
Nooooooo! I loved Anthony & Gia together!!! One of my fave Aussie celeb couples. I think he’ll come to regret this. His family must be so angry and disappointed with him!
Wow, I never realised that Anthony was an Aussie. His American accent was unquestionable. I first saw him in “Betsy’s Wedding”. The movie was lame, sure, but he was rather cute in it.
His ex-wife looks beautiful. He seems like an idiot in this one, for sure. Too bad.
Yeah, this sucks. They are both Aussies and seemed really well suited. Dammit.
I wonder how these dudes feel when they see their young girlfriends talking to Zac Efron at one of those Hollywood parties.
Do you think they notice how old they look in photos next to a girl who could easily be their child?
Men are never as critical of themselves as women are of themselves. They think they look great even when they don’t.
I’m in my early 30s and sometimes when I come across on-line dating profiles or meet men at events who are in their early to mid 20s, I just think to myself that most of them are actually boys and not men. I understand that some people in their early 20s are very mature and ready for marriage and the real world, but they are becoming few and far between. Even with a 10-year age difference, I feel like I’ve seen and experienced so much more than someone in his 20s that I wouldn’t be able to connect with most of those men on a deeper level. Imagine being in one’s 50s and dating someone of that age. Besides the few exceptions, these relationships are usually just young girls looking for a sugar daddy and older men looking for sex with a hotter young woman to feed their egos. I read on the Daily Mail article that he gifted her with a Mercedes Benz. Ha. So typical.
I’m with you. My husband works at a college, and as nice as his students are, they are beyond immature. Painfully so. Even the ones in their mid-twenties. Even in my late 20’s I could never imagine having dated one that was 10 years younger.
To each his own, but she sounds like she’s not in it for all the glorious love. <3
I’d still rather date a 26-year-old than a 56-year-old though.
^^^ This!!! Esp. a 56 year old middle aged dude trying to recapture his youth, pretty sure there are just as much of those as there are immature 26 year olds.
Boo! They were such a nice couple. Ugh. It’s not just 50 year old men. My first husband (at 35) left me for a 23-year old grad student. It’s an epidemic.
I thought she looked great for 51, then I realised that I was looking at the 26 year old. Now, not so much.
Yeah, at first I thought the top photo was from a few years ago with his ex-wife. Personally I think his ex-wife looks better and has aged very gracefully. It’s too bad that he has not aged gracefully and threw away his marriage for this old looking 26-year-old side piece.
She’s not old looking to me. Not sure what you’re seeing here.
On the same line.. I saw pictures of Richard Gere who is 65 with his 32 year old new girlfriend.. so there are a lot of men doing this much much much younger girlfriend trend.. And I don’t think it is just in Hollywood.
Richard looked so old in those photos, like her grandfather. I know in person in a suit he still has major charisma, but in photos you see the massive age difference. I saw that thriller Arbitage he did, and I hadn’t thought he was sexy for years with his white hair. But he still exuded sexiness in person, but still older. That woman he was photographed with I think is just a party girl who hangs around rich people. They call her a “socialite.” A socialite like Paris Hilton is what I’m figuring, empty upstairs. Of course, maybe that’s all he wants for right now. I hope he doesn’t become a cliche and marry her.
Perhaps it’s a bit different with Gere, and he just wants company at times. After all, he still has the Dalai Lama;-) The woman is a ‘socialite’, which basically means she’s attending the parties of the rich&famous, and I think he knows that. He tried marriage twice, and it was reported that he likes to withdraw a lot, and spend time alone, whereas his second wife wanted to go out more…so this here might just literally be a companionship for certain periods, and purposes. LaPaglia probably cheated, she found out, and showed him the door. He might not have intended to actually leave this beautiful wife…
Well as far as withdrawing, the gossip blogs had Gere shamelessly hitting on other restaurant patrons, so he must not be all that withdrawn. He landed in the douchebag category once I heard about that.
two examples are not really saying its a lot of men doing it and its mostly confined to places where powerful and rich men are, Hollywood is just one of those places. but in the real world its very rare. same goes for couples that are very different in physical attractiveness. they exist but its very rare in regular people.
Ah, the mid-life pursuit of the fountain of youth. No cliche there!
Same old story, of course it becomes a clichè, seems like an hollywood standard. It’s disgusting, and I don’t know what those young girls are thinking either (and don’t talk to me about it being love).
The only dude in his 50’s I’d date *cough*marry*cough* is Keanu Reeves. And I’m 31 so I guess at least I’m out of my 20’s? I know someone is going to yell at me for implying 26-year-olds have nothing to say but WHAT do these two talk about?
Stay away from my Keanu!!
I love how Keanu is like a Universal Boyfriend. Everyone and their grandmother loves to claim him. 😃
Keanu forever!!!
😍😍
Listen, I will back away from many dudes but NOT Keanu. He’s my forever dong and has been for nearly 20 years. NOTHING is going to change that! *sharpens nails*
Back off, Kitten. Keanu’s mine. Mine, mine, mine!!!
I’d date Jerome Flynn from Game of Thrones. He is 52. I’m 34.
Because Keanu is HOT and a precious snowflake that must be protected. Also, he is an unaging vampire.
He was SO hot in John Wick recently. Unaging vampire/Dorian Gray for sure.
Keanu is my CB husband. Back off, bitches!
Ugh …
Anthony and Gia met on a movie set I think. Paperback Romance. Cute movie if you can find it. I still have it on VHS – too bad I no longer have a VHS machine. Sad he left her. They seemed like a nice couple.
Smh…that’s all I got.
Same old story.
Same old predictable, cliche, pathetic story.
He looks terrible.
Midlife crisis. I hope he pays big for this. These young girls care only about money and press and hopefully she will get none.
Another geezer unwilling to face aging and especially his own mortality. So immature. Scaredy cat.
Yup – you said it. Can’t deal with his own mortality, so he goes running for the hills in order to pretend he’s not old anymore.
Basically, he’s dating his fear of death.
It’s no mystery. Men will always lust after young women and if they have even the slightest chance with one they will take it. As for the girls, these men are filthy rich and can spoil them beyond their wildest dreams. Even if they love their wives, their d~ck overrules their brain. It’s happening more and more even among couples that are not wealthy. Now that divorce is no big thing any more, men don’t wanna stick around once they get bored and their wives aren’t ‘hot’ any more. Look at porn sites, how often do you see two 50 year olds going at it? Never, It’s always a 50/60 year old man with a 22 year old. This is what men are watching and it’s what they want. The whole ‘starter wife concept is true. If you a woman who marries an very rich man and are similar ages, then the odds are he will drop you once you’ve had his kids and wasted your youth – but at least you get loads of money!
Might as well be realistic! I have no interest in getting married because it’s just too hard to make it to the end and i’ve seen too many friends/relatives go through enough messy divorces to make me give it a huge miss!
His girlfriend looks like Stella McCartney. I’m curious if this were a woman and a younger man would the comments be different.
My husband is ten years younger than me, and we met when he was in his early 20s and went on our first date when he was 26. People sure felt free to tell both of us we were making horrible mistake! haha. The Sam Johnson stories comments were less golddiggery, more mommy issue.
I think if there is no infidelity or non-adult kids involved, let people fuck and love who they want to. Life is too short to care about this shit.
Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez were called cougars and they’re in the same age range as the guys they’ve dated. And they’re still only in their 20s. I think women have it tougher when it comes to dating even slightly younger.
Most people assume Casper is with J-Lo for the money, even though the age difference isn’t 30 years. Even those of us who are women don’t get it. But this is Casper we’re talking about.
Weren’t Demi and Ashton made fun of a bit? A 15 year age difference doesn’t seem quite as bad as this 30 year age difference (and both were legitimately single when they met!). 30 years age difference and a wife and kid would be too much for me. Well, even if he was my age, the wife and kid would be too much for me!
I never get why people say Caspar is in it for the money. Not that he doesn’t enjoy it. That would be a fact for anyone. But Jennifer is beyond stunning and a very hot body, and he is average looking They have dance in common. Why wouldn’t he be crazy about her?
Maybe it’s because of the rumours that he cheats on her with transsexuals (not sure if I’m using the correct terminology, but this is the term I see used in gossip items). Because of that, people assume he’s not that into her.
I have no problem believing other 20 something years old would be into her however.
@Perplexed, that’s true.
And just to add, even the celeb marriages that are celebrated have all been second/third marriages – Sting, Bruce Springsteen, Tom Hanks, Paul Newman etc – they all married their mistresses. Those marriages worked, but the starter wives were all sent packing for more glamorous pieces that were eager to play the fame game with them. Sting supposedly has an open marriage – he has been photographed going to one of those special ‘massage’ parlors. Bruce Springsteen has cheated on Patti but she tuns a blind eye to it – in one of her songs she writes ‘you can play around, but don’t you play around me’ – even Paul and Joanne had separations and rumors of infidelity. The only person there has never been a whiff off cheating (that i know of) is Tom Hanks, but he did cheat on the mother of his kids with Rita.
There have been rumors about Tom Hanks cheating on Rita.
Ginnifer Goodwin was the guess for a lot of blind items and gossip nuggets.
Didn’t those guys cheat with women closer to their own ages though? Don’t condone cheating, but it’s easier to see why Tom Hanks’s marriage has lasted and this one will probably fail, if it even gets to the marriage stage. This one doesn’t look like she’ll stick around once he has to start doling out alimony payments…
Also at 56 his health is about to become more complex…high blood pressure, stress tests, high cholesterol, metabolic syndrome, early stage prostate cancer, etc., etc., etc.
From observation, it seems like a lot of these younger partners leave when the older person starts developing age-related health problems, because they were only in it for the lifestyle and the good times. Meanwhile the older person thought they were investing in a future caregiver.
It seems a bit cruel to me, but I guess that’s just how shallow people live their lives.
All great points, @PennyLane.
I also wonder about the sex. At 56, things have slowed down considerably. Of course, there’s the Geezer’s Little Helper, Viagra. I imagine she tells him he’s wonderful, all the time. Fool.
Don’t they realize posing next to a 20-something makes them look even older? Want to look younger? Take your mom to premiers!
Any man that leaves his wife for a new shiny young toy disgusts me regardless of age. Peter Facinelli leaving Garth is just as gross as LaPaglia leaving his. Dean McDermott, Depp, Michael Douglass and Kelsey Grammer; etc are all disgusting and pathetic.
Michael Douglas didn’t leave his wife for Catherine. It took a very long time for their divorce to be finalized because of fighting over their huge assets, but he had separated and dating for quite a while. They separated in ’95 and finally the divorce was finalized in 2000. He and Catherine started dating in ’99.
My ex new michael douglas’s ex wife when she was a current wife and it was said she asked Michael for money at the dinner table with them(my ex and his parents), he gave her $500 in cash and she asked “That’s it?” She also was supposedly ridiculously anorexic and ate like a bird. I heard this all from my ex’s parents and believe them.
No. Douglass was married when he hooked up with CZJ. He even admitted that he was after her for a while when he was married.
Stevie D, I am disappointed.
*hopes someone gets the reference
Betsy’s Wedding. Best movie Anthony was ever in.
Yes! I knew I couldn’t be the only one :))
Me too. I love Stevie D. And Empire Records. But I am so disappointed he turned into the aging actor leaves his wife for the young golddigger cliché.
I’m 34 and I must admit I have a bit of a celeb crush on the Bronn guy from Game of Thrones (he is 52). I totally would love to date someone older again(I dated a 36 year old when I was 25 and got hell for dating someone so OLD by my friends; needless to say I always think fondly of him). My current bf is 4 years older than me and just isn’t too excited about me anymore(Too used to me I guess). I’d kind-of love to be an older man’s darling again. To be clear though, I don’t want someone else’s money, I just want to travel with someone (we pay our own way for it) and not have to worry about the man wanting kids(my current man doesn’t, but I feel at my age, a lot of men my age do and that is a no go for me).
Love older men, always have, and now I’m in my 40’s!
Don’t underestimate them, ladies.
You have no idea what you are missing if you pass them by.
Of course, Anthony is a dbag for doing this to his wife! I was just speaking “in general” about my love for older men. Not him. ick
To each their own ;)… you don’t know either what you’re missing… at least all of us will get to know how it into be with men older when times come… while the reverse is quite harder…
11 year age difference seems common enough.
30 year age difference — honestly, I don’t know anyone with this kind of age difference. It seems pretty rare, at least among non-Hollywood-folk or anyone on Dr. Phil.
Sorry, I meant “anyone NOT on Dr. Phil.”
I work with two women who are 25 to 30 years younger than their husbands and have been married for 10-plus years. Both were in their 20s and apparently did not date a lot otherwise.
One seems happy; the other views her husband as very controlling and jealous. Both women have stepchildren their age, too. And neither guy was wealthy.
Wow. Very interesting.
Eh, this happens every day. There’s no fool like an old fool.
I don’t think it is mid-life crisis. I think old men have more options when they are rich and famous. Some of these men did the traditional thing (get married, have kids) but after awhile they grew bored with that and since they have more options, they take them. that being said, he looks like her father, which is a bit skeevy to me.
I’m honestly bored in my 8 year relationship and would love someone else to come along to spice my love life up (an affair or new relationship, whichever), so I am probably going to be raked over the coals for any of these comments I am sure. I probably would also feel differently if I wasn’t bored in my relationship. I feel like is this all there is? I am sure a lot of men/women feel that way too. Not everything lasts forever sadly it seems, especially marriage these days. My parents have been together nearly 40 years and seemed plum miserable past 20+, so I am not sure I had great marriage role models either.
I have an honest question: if you aren’t happy in your relationship and aren’t married/ don’t have kids, and are wanting to have an affair, why don’t you just break up with the boyfriend and explore your options?
If you feel this way in your current relationship, why not break up? Why wait for an affair or new relationship to happen first? Truly curious, not judging.
I don’t have the financial means to go at it comfortably on my own and my parents when they found out what I could afford livingwise would insist on giving me money to balance it out and I just don’t want to be dependent on them financially(I will inherit a lot one day, that is enough in and of itself). I am an only child and my dad really has an issue on the quality of place I am living (nothing extreme, just doesn’t want me in a dump or even a basement apartment which is what i could afford on my salary currently). I have no friends I could room with and at my age (34) I really don’t want a random roommate either. I also honestly don’t have much of a support system (my super close friends are all hundreds of miles away). Plus, if I am really being honest, in my 20’s I always had a jumpoff.
The kicker is he is aware of my unhappiness but since he loves me and is happy with the way things are, he sees no reason to change them. He has talked to me at length how he realizes if I get a better offer, I will jump ship, but that doesn’t even motivate him, just makes him sad. LOL Some men really love being in their own bubble and get stuck in their happy little ruts.
I’m not being sarcastic when I say this and I’m not sure how tone comes across in post, but what about couples therapy if leaving is difficult? Maybe couples therapy could rekindle some spark. I’m making a sincere suggestion, not a joke.
I’ve suggested that many times and we have the means to go to some sessions but he says he feels they will just tell him what he already knows and they can’t possibly improve the situation tremendously (to be honest one of the major issues is our lack of sexual compatibility over these past few years, he only is interested once a week, I like it a lot more and my self esteem is wrecked from such a lack of intimacy). He claims it isn’t a switch he can just turn on. To be honest, I had an affair several years ago on the same man and it really spiced things up for awhile for he had such a fear of losing me (awful I know). I know these are all huge flags. I didn’t leave him for other guy because the other guy wasn’t settled in his life and I didn’t want someone who was going to mooch off of me (which he would have had to) when I can just get by on my own.
Andrea, it sounds like you need to grow up.
I am not sure how my situation means I am immature…I’ve never cheated on any other boyfriend, but sadly my boyfriend has many times not fulfilled me with regards to sex, intimacy etc. I am sure a lot of men/women have felt the same in relationships as well.
Is there a way to increase your earnings (new job or additional work, etc) so that you can afford to leave? It sounds to me that lack of funds is your biggest hurdle right now.
So you are basically willing to use this guy as a (young) sugar daddy with the full understanding that you will jump ship at anything better that comes along? Yeah, I think you can expect to get raked over the coals. Compounded by the fact that your partner has no self-respect for sticking around in this relationship….and lack of self-respect does not make him an attractive partner for you….maybe time to write Dan Savage and get his take on this one.
To be clear, we split things equally for everything(despite the fact that he makes 2 times more than me). I have many friends argue that he should give me as much as he puts into retirement for my retirement and he should give me money, but I refuse. I never take anything extra. But his 1/2 helps me a lot.
Well you’re not the first or last person who’s in a relationship simply for $$$ …
I am hoping for a promotion at work soon which will help my situation greatly. Training someone below me now to take over a lot of my duties so I can move into a more of a sales role.
Best of luck Andrea!
I remember back in the 1990s I gave a massage to Chuck Norris and his girlfriend Monica, and the girlfriend’s mom. Chuck was 51 at the time, and the GF was 19!! The mom defended her, telling me that ‘she is very mature for her age.’ Yikes. I don’t think he married her, but his next gf that he did marry was around the same age.
“I remember back in the 1990s I gave a massage to Chuck Norris…” – You win. 😀
LOL this ^
LOL, +1!!! /thread
No LOL, I think I just threw up a little…
The Chuck/young girlfriend/mother story reminded me of a guy I knew long ago (eternal bachelor to this day) who dated a 19 year old when he was 38 or 39. Supposedly he would take the teenager’s mother with them on many of their dates.
Why in the world do guys take the mother (who is likely their own age) along? Trying to win them over, perhaps?
Honestly I wonder about the desperation of a 26 year old prepared to touch a 56 year old with a barge pole. What is so wrong with her that she can’t get someone her own age and what makes her lower herself to be with an elderly man?
I can understand the old guys desperation, he’s desperately clinging on to some youth before he dies. And he’s getting sex from someone who doesn’t have wrinkles and liver spots.
The only thing I can see in it for her is money/status/fame which is prostitution. Why would you want to be known for that? He’s not even an appealing john.
I wonder if she gets tempted by the younger guys she sees at Hollywood parties. Through him, she’d gain access to more attractive and fit people. If they weren’t in Hollywood, I guess I could see her not having as many options ( like, for instance if’s she’s more of a homebody and doesn’t go out to bars or restaurants or anywhere really where people her own age could be met), but if she’s on his arm at Celebrity X’s party and she seems some attractive actor with abs of steel and a somewhat charming personality over there….er, then, what?
Let’s be honest. The new young girlfriend may only be 26 which is a huge draw for him, but she is average looking at best – plain. She isn’t even built particularly well – at least not fit from what I see so she’s already reached her peak. I don’t see great looking or even good-looking guys knocking down her door. She landed a very rich older man who probably thinks she is beautiful just because of her youth alone. My take is she can’t land any younger men she’s attracted to – only older men and even though we’re mad at this guy, he is good looking for being in his 50s. She probably thinks she’s hit the jack pot and not just financially. He’s probably super into her and makes her feel gorgeous. Young dudes would not feel that way about her unless they were average or dull as well. I don’t see young hollywood studs or even non-hollywood young studs posing any threat.
I notice with my older relatives both men and women – how much they exagerrate young people’s looks – words like beautiful, gorgeous, etc. and they’re not – like not at all. Youth has a way of making older people think younger ones are better looking than they really are. It’s the youth itself they are attracted to.
@Jennifer, everything you said was pretty spot on. My experience with May-Decembers–when the man not exceptionally rich and looking for trophy wife who looks like a supermodel–the younger one tends to be plain and nothing to boast about in the looks department. They often struggle with guys their own age, so older men who lust after and wax poetic about youth are easier catches. And as you said, youth makes things look better than they really are to older people. I remember on an advice blog I frequent where a reader wrote in that her female boss kept making comments about her looks. One particularly creepy commentator said the letter writer should just accept the comments as compliments because if you are young, how can you not be beautiful?
…
My husband is six years older than me. Doesn’t sound like alot but when we hooked up, I was a mere 23 and he was almost 30. I have always known part of the attraction was me being a bit younger. He got to show me everything – take me to all these places and do all these things he’d already done but I had not and so he really broadened my horizons in terms of world experience and stepping out of my comfort zone. He also has always thought I’m freakeshly beautiful. I am not. I’m attractive, but to him, attractive plus younger totally put me in a different catagory for him. And, I can admit I adored being the passenger and just enjoying everything becuase he definitely took the wheel. He wined and dined me, took me on weekend trips all the time and gave me gifts when we got there. He was older enough to be in a good financial position and he knew how to romance me. He was more experienced in the bedroom and I liked that too. Aside from not being a virgin, I was pretty inexperienced, so again it was he introduced me to anything remotely kinky. I understand the attraction for him in that. It was probably like being a teacher somewhat and knowing he was the only one I’d done those things with. I know, I know, to some it sounds unequal or babyish, but evidentally we were both what eachother need and wanted – perfect fit. We’re going on married 18 years – plus 3.5 years before we got married. My point is I have always thought me being younger than him was a huge attraction for both of us. It wasn’t a big age difference but the specific ages we were made it significant.
And he’s not even a well-known john!
(I posted previously that I did not know who this guy is).
Initially, it might be weird, but considering 26 year old boys are not terribly sexual yet, and still kinda focused on perfecting some act that they think makes them “experienced” it’s not that incredible for a young woman to hook up with an older guy. Looks aren’t everything, especially once you get down to it. And, it’s kind of cliche, but also quite true, good looking younger guys are just clueless in bed.
I can understand a difference of 15 years or so. Not 30 years — that’s like a whole different generation. I don’t think looks are everything, but 30 years is way different than just 10 years. And a married guy is different from a single one…
sorry but younger guys nowadays might be way much experienced and spot on than older generations concerning sex…. younger generations have lots and lots of experience in that department….
PLus I would have agree if you are comparing men (boys) in their early twenties to guys in their let say 30’s… but there is no way you can compare a heavily middle-age men to men in their 30’s even their 40s… they are way more virile… and far from clueless…your comment made me laugh out loud! LOL!
Maybe money, status & fame are attractions in the relationship but I would add “excitement.” How exciting it must be for her to be romanced and swept her feet attending posh events, flying private jets, driving ridiculously expensive cars, 4 star restaurants on the regular, etc. It all kinda falls under “money” but it’s more than just being rich – it’s the excitement of it all.
I will forever love Gia Carides in Strictly Ballroom
Always makes me wonder the age of the father/mother when people that young hook up with someone that old. I’m 33 and the idea of dating someone who is 56 and the same age of my dad gives me hives.
Well, at least they didn’t fight over money and him trying to screw her over. I went and read an old article from April back when it was announced they were divorcing, and it said in February they had the divorce papers drawn up, but that he didn’t sign them until March or April, but that he agreed to pay her child support and alimony.
Trying to recapture their youth. Guaranteed to fail. Women try to reverse the clock and feel ‘viable’ weigh plastic surgery, and men try to do so by boinking young women to feel ‘virile’. We’re all pathetic. lol
Younger women are bowled over by the wealth, sure. Not necessarily the money, but the lifestyle it throws them into, going out to great restaurants, a more sophisticated man. Maybe she dated a few guys before him that dumped her and their date night was going to a bar or ordering a pizza and beer, no sweeping her off her feet, no romancing her, no thoughtfulness. She meets this famous guy, who probably charmed her, made her feel iike she is the most beautiful girl in the world (she’s average from the photo), adores her, loves to shop with her, buy her something, sweeps her off to an amazing vacation, is interesting, worldly, on and on, and she lapped up the attention.
I have a friend who complains that men don’t know how to be a gentleman these days. She is in her early 40’s and she also states that only wealthy men know how to treat a lady (bs if you ask me, she is still single btw and might be sleeping with her married boss LOL). I think some women really want to be adored and frankly, a lot of older men are just grateful these younger women will have them and thus, give them perhaps better treatment than say a 25 year old just starting out in his career would.
I would think of a 56-year old man as SERIOUSLY to old for me, by about 15 years. I’m 35.
My ex was 8/9 years older than I am, sure he was established and used to treat me, but he treated me like shit, with his verbal put downs and always trying to parent me.
I thought I was more mature than I actually am thats why I dated an older man.
My new bf is my age, we go half’s on beer and pizza but I don’t care because I feel happy with him
Well, my grandmother always said it’s as easy to love a rich man as a poor one! 😜
@Sauvage – totally agree, grandads are not my thing and I’m 35 this year.
That said, I’ve always had a thing for Sam Neill (palaeontologist guy from Jurassic Park). It must be the Aussie accent she went for…..
I hear you, girlfriend. Sam Neill is fine. I, on the other hand, am still hung up on 90s-Gabriel Byrne , who, as it happens, is also exactly thirty years my senior.
I always had a thing for Gabriel Byrne too!
Aw. Now he will live forever!! O_o.
It always makes me wonder how young these men would go if pesky little laws didn’t get in the way.
“We wouldn’t be late for this award show if you didn’t hide your booster seat in the laundry room-again! Now, go get your sippy cup..”
Congrats to Gia on her freedom! Anthony gets a second childhood for a year or two until this trick leaves him.
I just can’t with this crap anymore. You’re married. WTF is wrong with you? What’s wrong with some woman who’s okay with this kind of man and what he does to his wife??
I actually thought the wife he left was the woman in the first photo.
Jump-off is the equivalent of “greige”
I don’t know whether this is a step UP for him….
How do the men react when someone asks the lady if that’s her dad, and she has to explain, no, that’s really her boyfriend? Don’t they find that embarrassing?
When my (widowed) dad was 71 years old, he knocked up his maid/housekeeper, who was 25 years old at the time. Five years younger than me. Eventually, when their kid was about 3 or 4 years old, he married her. I actually like my dad’s wife, she is a good person and takes good care of him and if his health declines, she will be there for him. (I actually think my dad took advantage of her — she was a poor girl who had never lived apart from her family and basically knew nothing about the world, and then went to work for my dad in his house where it was just the two of them — when he, as her employer, made advances on her, I’m pretty sure that was textbook sexual harassment.)
I think my dad is totally gross because their age difference is crazy. That’s a 46-year age difference between them. My dad could reasonably be his wife’s grandpa. Even if it were a 30-year age difference, and he got with someone in her early 40s, I could have understood that better.
Oh Dee, yikes, that must have been something to come to terms with. I really have to give you much deserved credit to see the situation for what it was though. It is incredibly hard to get those blinders off when it comes to your own parents. It seems even tougher to do that with fathers, for some reason.
As his daughter (or son) you really could have made that situation much worse for her. Instead, you came from a place of honestly and compassion. It sounds like she is really lucky to have you in her life.
Thank, Kym. I appreciate your comment a lot. The fact is, I feel lucky that if my dad had to do some boneheaded thing like this, at least the young woman he knocked up turned out to be a decent human being. He could have made a very different “choice.”
Mid-life crisis?
He is trying to keep himself relevant and in the public eye. Roles appear to have dried up for him, and it seems that he thinks that switching to a younger woman is the way to go. Of course the tragedy here is not the ended marriage, but how Gia Carides sacrificed her career for this man, to be in the background. She is a way better actor than her ex-husband.
Girl, take a good look at that skin. You only have kin like that once and you’re wasting it on a grandpa.
The minute I looked at his photo, all I could think was ” hair dye, upper blepharoplasty, Botox, and maybe…maybe a face and neck lift. Kinda hard to tell with the beard. All the trappings of a midlife crisis.